Sparks in the Dark

Have you ever felt like you are the only one investing in your walk with God, burned out, or chasing after God’s approval though your actions?

My ideal time with Jesus consists of waking up, reading a devotion from my grandma Dotty’s old devotion book, studying one chapter of Scripture, and filling out three pages of note space in my Give Me Jesus journal. I also seek to avoid my phone until having this intimate time with God. Walks with Jesus in the afternoon set my heart ablaze.

All of my little ways of delving deeper into the heart of God make me more like Him. I taught a lesson on discipline to my young adults small group two weeks ago. Ever since then, I have personally struggled with being held captive to my own attempts to be disciplined.

I’ve been reading the book of Mark. Jesus really shot a truth at my heart in chapter 2 verse 27. It says, “Then he told them, ‘The Sabbath was made for man and not man for the Sabbath.”

I have really been thinking of this verse and how nothing other than Jesus should be Lord over us. If our lord is an ideal time with Jesus or set of strict rules on ourselves, then our focus cannot truly be completely on Jesus.

The balance of these things is tough to find. I came to a point of exhaustion this past week and told God how I felt. I had believed the lie that my walk with Him was mainly dependent upon me seeking Him. Thinking of my routine with Jesus felt dreadful rather than exciting. 

I took a break from work and normal activities yesterday and went back to my meeting spot with the Father (our woods). Even when the enemy tries to keep our mouths closed, Jesus knows our words must flow to Him. He reads our hearts but there is something quite special about speaking out what we are feeling inwardly. 

Maybe you have been at a block in your time with Jesus. You might be thinking you have to buy a new Bible to have better time with Jesus. 

I just want to remind you that Jesus is with you all of the time. He is available to us no matter where we find ourselves. He is the breath inside of our lungs. Shopping and sports are fun but only Jesus satisfies us.

He knows the road before us. I heard a quote recently where someone said, “Focus more on what’s going on in you than what’s going on around you.”

I deeply desire to be prepared for my next season of life. What I am learning is Jesus equips us for where He calls us to go.

Are we seeking Him as employees or children? We must first realize our role as heirs to all Jesus has access to before we try to go share Him with others.

My youth pastor recently preached a message on just getting alone with Jesus on our own time. We do not have to wait until a cool conference, church service, or youth retreat. The same Jesus who meets with and awakens stadiums lives inside of us.

If you are weary in seeking Jesus, tell Him how you feel. He already knows you’re ragged from chasing your own methods. I love how Matthew 7:7 (NIV) declares, “’Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”

Our relationships with Jesus require our part and His. He has already sought and pursued us. Yet, His love never grows stagnant or cold for us.

I encourage you to not lose hope in chasing after Jesus. Lay down some of your own practices as you just emit your heart to the Father in prayer. Spend uninterrupted time with Him and I can guarantee He will renew you. He will change your heart. He will ignite the spark so that you can seek Him even when life seems to grow dark.

Much love, 


“May the Lord direct your hearts to God’s love and Christ’s endurance.” -2 Thessalonians 3:5 (CSB)

“But as for you, brothers and sisters, do not grow weary in doing good.” -2 Thessalonians 3:13

“May the Lord of peace himself give you peace always in every way. The Lord be with all of you.” -2 Thessalonians 3:16


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